A Smile Shouldn't Hurt
by CupcakesOnMyConverse
Summary: "When you smile like that, it looks like it hurts you. A smile shouldn't hurt. I don't like it when you're hurting." Who knew that Brittany would be the one to make him smile again? Then again, Kurt's life has never really had a semblence of normalcy.


**AN: I love Kurtanny! They are so adorable. This is kind of angsty, though, and it gives Britt a bit of a third dimension. I love her. So much.**

_I miss my dolphin. -B_

That one text message is all it takes for Kurt to call Brittany.

Leaving her was one of the hardest things about transferring to Dalton, Kurt decides. He'd known that Mercedes and Tina would keep in touch through Skype and phone calls. Britt _did_ text him every once in a while, but she either had a hard time working her phone, or just forgot sometimes. That didn't offend him at all. Brittany forgot a lot of things, including her own last name. And Kurt was a hundred percent positive that Brittany had trouble working computers in general, let alone Skype.

Kurt had immediately called her back, suggesting they hang out that weekend. Brittany eagerly agreed. So that's why they were currently sitting in Kurt's basement bedroom, while Kurt was educating Brittany about the beauty of the Wicked soundtrack. Well, _trying _to educate might be better words for it. Teaching Brittany anything was a feat in and of itself.

Brittany can't tell what the music is about. Sometimes the people talk to fast, or they use words too big for her to understand. It sounds pretty, though. The main reason she likes it is because Kurt is closing his eyes and singing quietly to himself, swaying back and forth and a smile is on his face. Brittany likes seeing Kurt happy. It's not something she sees very often. Even less now that he's going to Hogwarts.

Brittany waits to talk until the CD ends, because she likes looking at Kurt's happy face. He's pretty, she decides. When the final notes of the last song are done, he opens his eyes, smiling at her.

"You look happy," she tells him, excited.

"That's because I am happy," he responds, and her smile grows. "You make me really happy, Brittany."

"You make me really happy too, Kurtsie." Kurt hates that nickname. He hates it so much that it makes his blood boil, but since it's coming from Brittany, it's almost okay. Because she can't remember that he doesn't like it when she calls him that, so he stops reminding her. Only Brittany is allowed to call him that. Only Brittany.

And Brittany is telling him the truth, when she says that he makes her happy. Because Kurt is a boy that doesn't need to kiss her, or make out with her, or have sex with her to make her feel this way. It's not just because he's capital G gay, and Brittany knows that he'll never want her like that. It's more like because Kurt is the only boy that has ever truly respected her and accepted her for who she is. He's never rolled his eyes at her, or told her that she was stupid, even though she knows that she is. He's never been anything but patient, explaining big words, and not using ones he knew she wouldn't understand. Kurt is one of the only people that she can actually respond to when he talks to her with the confidence that her words make sense. Kurt is one of the only people who makes Brittany feel smart.

She doesn't even know if he does it on purpose, but he does. He makes her feel like she knows stuff. He talks to her about Glee club, dancing, and Cheerios. Stuff she knows enough about to continue conversation. It makes her feel more like a person, less like an object.

"I like seeing you happy, Kurt," Brittany continues. "I wish you were happy more."

"I'm happier more now," Kurt tells her, turning off the CD as it starts to replay.

"Yeah, but I don't get to see your pretty smile since you started going to Hogwarts," Brittany tells him, and Kurt smiles at her, sitting next to her on the couch.

"You see me now," he points out, and she shrugs.

"Yeah, but it's not enough Kurt," she complains, looking at him. "And you never looked happy when you went to school with me, so you're going to stay at Hogwarts."

"I didn't leave because of you, Britt, you know that right?" Kurt asks her, and she shrugs, tears flooding her blue eyes. This breaks Kurt's heart. Brittany is too sweet, too beautiful, too innocent to cry. "I went to Dalton because people weren't nice to me like you are." He smiles at her, but it's not the same.

"Does it hurt?" she asks, and Kurt scrunches up his eyebrows in a way that he's never done when talking to her before. This is how other people look at her when she talks. Not Kurt. Kurt has never looked at her like this before.

"Does what hurt?" he asks, thoroughly confused.

"When you smile like that. It looks like it hurts you. A smile shouldn't hurt. I don't like it when you're hurting."

"No," Kurt lies, because smiling like that does hurt him. Not physically of course, just emotionally, psychologically. "Not really."

"That's not your happy smile!" Brittany accuses him. "That's your I'll-pretend-to-be-happy-so-Brittany-doesn't-notice-smile!" He winces, because she's right. "I may not be the sharpest crayon in the drawer, Kurt, but I'm not an idiot." He wants to laugh at what she'd just said, but since she was completely serious, he decided against it. It would hurt her feelings if he laughed at her now, and Kurt hates hurting Brittany.

"How do you stand it?" she asks quietly, her voice becoming small.

"Stand what?"

"People calling you capital G gay. But they don't say it like I do. They say it to be mean. No one should be mean to you, Kurtsie. You're too nice." He smiles a sad grin at her, and she gets even more upset.

"That one was even sadder!" she shrieks. "Why do you smile if you're sad?"

"Britt, have you ever heard the phrase 'you just gotta smile and bear it'."

"What do bears have to do with anything?" Kurt chooses to ignore her question, and just keep talking.

"Well, it means that you have to just pretend you're happy, even if you're not, to protect the people around you," he explains. "I'm smiling to protect you." Brittany doesn't get it, but she gives up. She doesn't get a lot of things, and this wasn't any different. Why would it be?

"What do you want to do now, Kurtsie?" he shrugs.

"What do you feel like doing?"

"Can I kiss you?" Brittany asks him. She likes kissing Kurt. He's a good kisser. When she kissed him, she didn't feel like he was trying to eat her face off. His lips are really soft too, and they taste like toothpaste. Brittany likes toothpaste. She swallowed a whole tube one time, and her mother had to call poison control. It was worth it, though she had ended up getting her tummy pumped.

"What else do you feel like doing?" he asks, giving her the look he gives her every time she asks. As much as Brittany likes kissing Kurt, he doesn't seem to enjoy it half as much.

"I'm hungry," Brittany says, rubbing her stomach.

"Breadstix is on me," Kurt smiles at her, and this time it looks a little more sincere. It's still not his happy smile, but Brittany doesn't push it. He's taking her to Breadstix, and because of the fact that she's getting two of her favorite things -Kurt and Breadstix- she lets him smile whatever way he wants to.

BPKHBPKHBPKHBPKH

Brittany and Kurt are having a fantastic time at lunch. They're talking about everything and nothing. That is, until Kurt's face goes pale. He looks so white. Is he sick? Maybe he found a mouse in his food too? He's not even "bearing" his smile now, not even trying. Brittany wonders why. Even that bear-smile is better than no smile at all. She doesn't understand, that is until Karofsky walks by. He's with an older man and woman she assumes are his parents.

Brittany doesn't really know why Kurt is so scared of Karofsky, but she does know that he _is _scared of him. Not that he's ever told her. Even though she's not good at school, Brittany has this thing where she can understand people. She sees things that nobody else can see. Especially with Kurt. His eyes tell her things that he doesn't need to say. Like right now, he's terrified. Brittany hates it. She hates the pain in his eyes. She frowns, but he doesn't see.

"Just go kill yourself, homo," he whispers as he passes. Brittany is suddenly mad. Really mad. Nobody talks to her dolphin like that. Brittany stands up, but Kurt grabs her wrist.

"It's not worth it, Britt. Just ignore it." She tears her wrist away from him, approaching Karofsky, and tapping him on the shoulder.

"Oh, hey Brittany," he smiles at her as he turns around. It's nowhere near as pretty as Kurt's smile. Did she sleep with him? She can't remember. If she did, she hates herself for it.

"Don't talk to Kurt like that," she says, feeling unafraid, and looking him straight in the eye.

"Since when are you friends with the fag?" he asks, laughing.

"It's not funny! Don't talk about him like that!"

"What are you going to do about it?" he asks her, and she frowns.

"Nothing," she answers, and he seems taken off guard. "But if you keep on saying things like that I'll make sure someone else will." Karofsky seems a little taken aback by the legitimacy of her threat, and so is Kurt. He's so grateful to Brittany, though he knows that it won't do anything. Brittany rarely stands up for anything- usually opting to hang in the background and let Santana or Quinn do all the talking. The fact that she was even standing up for him in the first was something special. Kurt realizes that Brittany must really care about him if she was putting herself out there like this.

Karofsky turns his back on her, and goes to follow his parents to a table. Brittany walks back to her table, smiling widely, and high-fiving Kurt. He's smiling now- the happy smile that she loves so much.

"Thank you Brittany, I really appreciate that," he says and she shrugs, smiling. Again, Kurt wasn't making her feel stupid. She'd done something right. She'd made Kurt smile. And that was enough for her.

"Just don't do it Kurt," Brittany whispers, suddenly somber.

"Do what?" Kurt asks, confused.

"Don't kill yourself," she says, looking up at him and into his eyes. "It would make me really sad. I don't want to lose my dolphin." Kurt takes her hand, looks into her eyes, and promises her.

"Never. I would never do that to myself," he vows. "Or to you," he tacks on as an after-thought.

"Thanks, Kurtsie," she says, wiping the tears from her eyes. "But he doesn't know you! How can he say things like that when he doesn't know how awesome you are?"

"I won't pretend to know, Britt." He says, squeezing her hand. Brittany smiles, but she doesn't know why. Kurt's hands are really soft.

"People do it to me too," she says. Kurt is confused at first, but then he understands. People call Brittany stupid on a daily basis, but he knows that she's not. No, she's not a genius, but she isn't stupid. She may think that the square root of four is rainbows, or that a 'ballad' is a duck, or want to go as a peanut allergy for Halloween, but that doesn't mean anything. Brittany knows people. She knows how to make Kurt feel better, and knows how to calm Santana down when she needs it.

"Come on Britt," Kurt says, laying down some cash, and offering his hand to her. She takes it, and they walk hand in hand to his car. Brittany notices the difference between this, and when she holds pinkies with Santana. This is better. Much better. It makes her feel like Kurt isn't afraid to be with her. It makes her feel safer, like he's sticking around longer. When Santana linked pinkies with her, she felt like the easiest thing could lure her friend away. But now, with her fingers interlocked with Kurt's she feels like he's going to have a harder time getting away, and she's going to have an easier time holding on.

**A/N: Oh, Brittany, dear. You will never know how much I love you. I absolutely adore her friendship with Kurt, it just seems natural to me. I don't know, whatever.**

** Quinn's character study was harder to write than I thought. I'm working on it now, but it got difficult, so I took a break and put this together in the meantime. Quinn's is just as if not as long as Kurt's, but it's very different from the other three that I've done. Let's just say Quinn's is a future fic, but that's all I'm going to say about that.**

** Anyhoo, leave a review and tell me what you think. I live for reviews. Really.**


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